Vivi's Back!

Hi Everyone,

I am, once again, thrilled to have the honor of delivering more good news about Vivi and her extraordinary battle against the Big C. Two weeks ago, Vivi received the results from her final CT scans, and they were completely clean! This means Vivi has been officially deemed IN REMISSION (!!!!!!!!!) - which technically means there is no traceable sign of cancer in her body. This news, while not entirely unexpected considering Vivi's incredible progress over the last 10 months, was certainly met with overwhelming relief and absolute joy.

I can still so clearly remember the day of Vivi's first surgery, sitting with our surgeon in that little holding room at Sloan Kettering, barely able to absorb what Dr. Abu-Rustum was explaining to us. As he sat across that little round table, which was adorned with nothing more than a small box of tissues, Dr. Abu-Rustum soberly delivered news, which he had clearly delivered to countless families before us, that the situation did not look very promising. At that point, the cancer was so far spread throughout Vivi's abdomen, he was not even able to perform surgery, and decided it would be best to try and shrink the tumors with chemo first. With such a prognosis sitting on our shoulders, our family heading down the road of this journey hoping for the best, but certainly preparing for the worst.

However, through each step of this process - nine rounds chemo, two surgeries, two near heart attacks, countless tests, and endless days and weeks in that hospital - Vivi made us all believers in the impossible, as she met each challenge with strength, spirit, and her impervious sense of humor.

While the last year has certainly presented the greatest challenge my family has yet faced, it is my mother who truly endured a test of the body and will that none of us could ever try to understand. It is also she, and she alone, who came out swinging with her 40-carats worth of diamonds, and fought an awe-inspiring battle for her life.

However, as I have said so many times before on this blog - there are countless doctors, nurses, nutritionists, chefs, family members, and friends, without whom my mother, nor our family, could have ever survived this last year. So, I will say it again, as it cannot be said nearly enough times - THANK YOU! Thank you, to all of you, from the very bottom of our hearts, for everything you have offered my mother and our family throughout this entire process. This overwhelming influx of love and support has touched each one of us so deeply, and allowed us all to remain strong and positive when, at times, such a feat seemed impossible.

I would also like to thank everyone for their generous donations to Team Vivi for our ride in Cycle for Survival - an event that raised money for Memorial Sloan Kettering. It was an absolutely moving and inspirational event, and raised money for a cause that is obviously near and dear to all of our hearts now. So thank you for supporting us!

With that said, I am thrilled to tell you that Vivi is getting stronger by the day, and already up to her old tricks. Surprisingly, she is also up to some new tricks, such as working out with a trainer twice a week (news which was almost more shocking than my mother's initial prognosis)! Tricks or not, my mother is certainly on the mend, and might I add, looking fabulous as ever as she sports her new, um, hair! And as the weather begins its slow but sure turn, I know my mother is looking forward to, once again, spending her time enjoying her favorite activities such as riding the trails of North Salem on her horse, and relaxing in the serene surroundings of our house on Lake Mahopac - luxuries that have been taken from her for far too long now.

However, it is certainly a challenge to simply move on with life as usual, as all of our lives have been forever altered by the events of the past year. We certainly remain hopeful that my mother's miraculous recovery will continue, but also remain mindful of the complicated disease she is facing, and the fact that we may not have, in fact, seen the end. However, we also forge forward with a new sense of strength, and, most certainly, a new sense of appreciation for all that life has to offer. After experiencing a year such as the one my family has just endured, all we want to do is spend our time with the people we care about in the most positive way possible.

Hence, our family has started a new tradition called "Monday Night Family Nights" where, together, we embark on a new fun activity each week. It is certainly a much needed shift from the countless Monday nights we have spent together in the hospital over the past year. It is also a welcome change for a family that never even managed to have a real family dinner together over the years! The pictures above are from our first Family Night a few weeks back when we all, including Vivi (as you can see) went bowling. I absolutely love these photographs, as they so perfectly embody Vivi's spirit, our collective feeling of redemption, and our attempt to move forward with life and FUN!

So as our family looks forward to the change of the seasons, and the turning of a new leaf, we hope you do as well.

All our love and gratitude...

Goodbye, Chemo!

Hi Everyone,

I am thrilled to report that today is Vivi's last day of chemo! After today, Vivi will have two weeks to recover from the treatment before she receives her first round of post-treatment scans and tests to ensure that everything is clear. At that point, we are hopeful she will be officially deemed "in remission", and even more hopeful that she will stay in remission for many, many years to come!

While these final rounds of treatment have been nothing short of incredibly challenging, Vivi has done her very best to remain strong and positive. Per usual, she has managed to maintain her infallible sense of humor, sparkle, magnetism, and, well...drama - even as she is hooked up to numerous machines. These Vivisms, along with her will and strength, which rival that of a bull, have, without a doubt, been the driving force behind my mother's rather miraculous recovery. After 9 rounds of chemotherapy, 2 surgeries, 2 near heart attacks, and countless tests and scans, Vivi is walking out of the other end of the "Big C" almost exactly as she walked into it (minus a bit of hair, but plus an unimaginable amount of head coverings).

These qualities have also, quite literally, made Vivi a star here at the hospital, which is simply not surprising. These last rounds of treatment have required a lot of hospital time, which is never easy. However, for Vivi, it has certainly not been boring either. Once word has spread that Vivi has checked into her room (private, of course!), a slew of nurses, doctors, technicians, and patients start pouring in for visits - not unlike the hordes of people who gather in Rome to greet the Pope. Just so you know, I am not even referring the to people who are actually here to treat her - who often have to push their way through the crowds that have gathered around my mother's hospital bed. Her visitors are various people she has come across through her time here at Sloan. In her Vivi-way, my mother has made each of these people feel as if she were their new best friend - or therapist in many cases. Only my mother can get someone to tell their entire life story while they are performing an EKG on her - after which, she will manage to get their phone number, home address, and email, and stay in touch with them on a rather regular basis (hence, how the word spreads so quickly upon my mother's arrival at the hospital). But such is the way of Vivi. She thrives and survives on connecting with other people, and feels special by making them feel special. And while I poke fun, and often role my eyes from my regular chair in the corner of her hospital room, it is through this truly special network of amazing people that my mother has found so much of her strength - and for that, I am eternally grateful. So, to everyone from Memorial Sloan Kettering who is on this list - thank you for the care you have offered Vivi, the support you have offered our family, and the friendship which, I am sure, will sustain my mother in her continued recovery.

So what now? Well, once it is determined that Vivi is officially in remission (meaning, there is no traceable cancer in her body), she will receive one last procedure to remove her chemo port. After that, she will be closely monitored, and will receive scans and blood tests every three to four months. We are hoping this will be coupled with her new diet and exercise regimen - right, mom?!?!?

While we are extremely hopeful about Vivi's prognosis (something we were not able to say just a few months ago), we also must remain realistic in our expectations about what lies ahead for Vivi. Ovarian cancer is just an extremely tricky and unpredictable cancer, which has an unfortunately high recurrence rate. However, Vivi has beat the odds (more like, kicked the living shit out of the odds) through every single step of this process, and I have no doubt she will continue to beat this disease with the same continued fervor and flair.

While I have said this in every post on this blog, I will continue to say it - we could not have gotten through ANY of this without the undying love, support, and prayers from all of you - our dear friends, family, and all the wonderful people on "Team Vivi" (Stefanie, Nathalie, Marti, Marcus, and more). While this has certainly been the most significant challenge our family has faced yet, it has also been a surprisingly positive experience on so many levels as well. Never in my life have I seen such true good, grace, and kindness from the people around me, and never before have I appreciated all the blessings in my life as I do now. I think you would be hard-pressed to find anyone in my family, especially my mother, who would feel differently.

As to be expected, my updates will be less frequent from here on out. However, I will try to let you know how Vivi is doing at least once in a while. Hopefully, you will periodically hear from Vivi, herself - that is, if she isn't too busy out riding her horse, or designing the latest and greatest in beaded and diamond jewelry!

So onto "normal" life we go. Hopefully, the only thing left for us to weather this winter is the snow. Thank you all, again, from the bottom of our hearts, for all you have done for my mother, for our family, and for being a part of this challenging journey.

As the last few drops of chemo make their way in, I am going to sign out. And with that, we are, officially...DONE!

The New Regimen

Hello All!

First of all, I hope everyone had a lovely Thanksgiving. As you can see from the photos above, we had a wonderful and festive holiday – filled with lots of family, friends, food, and fun! Thanksgiving has always been an important tradition in our family, especially our annual Macy’s Day Parade party. However, as I am sure you can imagine, this year was a particularly poignant holiday for us, as we are all much more cognizant of the many blessings we have to be thankful for. First and foremost, we were all extraordinarily grateful for the fact that my mother was feeling good, looking great, and able to enjoy the holiday weekend to its fullest! This is something we were not sure would be possible considering the proximity of the holiday to her surgery. However, not only did Vivi get to participate in the multi-day celebration - she was even up to her usual mischievous antics.

After a lovely morning parade party, which included appearances by some of our oldest and dearest friends, such as the Bergman boys, we enjoyed a tradition we have not had in years – Thanksgiving dinner at our house. Since my two older brothers, David and Marko, have moved to the east coast, we have traded off having the dinner at one of their houses. However, seeing as we were not sure about what Vivi’s health status would be during the holiday, we decided it would be best to plan a dinner within walking distance to her bed. I have to say, although it was simply a contingency plan, this year’s dinner was one of my favorite Thanksgiving meals that I can remember. Again, celebrating a holiday, the entire point of which is to be thankful, was particularly meaningful to all of us this year. It was a truly special moment to be sitting around a huge table, surrounded by my whole family (sadly, minus my sister and her children), hearing nothing but chatting, laughing, and chewing. I most especially enjoyed watching my mother sitting across the table from me, looking healthy and happy. While this has unquestionably been one of the toughest years our family has ever faced, we have quickly realized that such hard times can also manifest some rather extraordinary moments. Thursday night was no exception. While it certainly would have been easy to simply focus on the hardships of this past year, our family, per usual, took this as yet another opportunity to simply be thankful for each other and the many other blessings we have in our lives.

The following day, we headed out to New Jersey to my brother David’s house for our annual post-Thanksgiving make-your-own pizza party! While Vivi tried to play the C-card and get one of us to make a pizza for her, she ended up making her own “practically burnt” (the way she likes it) margarita pizza – or so she claims. I am still convinced my father ended up making it for her, in the end, which is just typical (cancer or not)! In any case, it was another evening of lovely family togetherness and fun.

For most people, a full Thanksgiving dinner followed by a full-on pizza party would be enough food to last them for at least a few weeks - not our family! On Saturday, we headed up to my brother Marko’s house in Connecticut for a feast of burgers, fries, and milkshakes. No joke! While none of this is in any way, shape, or form, on Vivi’s diet, we figured she deserved to indulge for the holiday weekend, especially as she would be heading back into treatment the following week.

That takes us to the present. I am currently sitting in Vivi’s hospital room at Sloan (private, of course!), as she is getting her first hydration treatment and prepping for the start of her new chemo regimen tomorrow. The new regimen will entail two chemo treatments during week 1 (this week) – one through an IV, and the second (which will be on Wednesday), through a port that goes straight into her abdomen. On Thursday, she will receive one more hydration treatment, and, if all goes well, she will go home that day. She will then have the weekend off, but will need to return to the hospital next Tuesday for week 2 of treatment. Week 2 will entail an overnight stay in the hospital to receive one more round of chemo through the port, and an additional hydration treatment. She will then have a little time off, and on day 21, she will start the cycle again.

In case some of you are not up to speed, Vivi has to receive her chemo treatments as an in-patient due to the complications she had with her heart during her first two rounds of chemo. This is also the reason the doctors want to make sure they keep her very well hydrated, as dehydration seems to be a significant factor in what triggered these heart complications during the first go-around.

Needless to say, this new regimen is going to be extremely intense, and very tough with all the hospital time (although, I am starting to think my mother prefers it here in her private room with a view). However, right now it seems she will only need to make it through three rounds of this chemo, and then she will hopefully be in full remission by late January!

After that, Vivi will be checked every three months to make sure that the cancer has not reoccurred. Unfortunately, ovarian cancer has an extremely high reoccurrence rate. However, seeing as Vivi has had a better response to her treatment than anyone would have expected, as well as the fact that she has stayed so seemingly healthy (outside of the cancer) through both her chemotherapy and the surgery, we have all reasons to believe that she can beat the odds! So what seemed to have been a not so hopeful scenario when Vivi was first diagnosed, has now turned into, what seems to be, quite a little miracle. Something I said many thanks for while sitting around that table on Thursday evening, and will continue to pray for as we head down her continued road to recovery.

I have said it before on this blog, but I attribute this miracle to several factors. First, anyone who knows Vivi, knows she is just one of a kind. Her positivity, sense of humor, and continued zest for life, has undoubtedly allowed this process to be as seamless (even fun, at times!) as possible. Additionally, I truly believe we have all of you to thank. This was the other blessing I have made sure to give thanks for – not only on Thursday night, but every single day since we have started this journey. We could not be luckier to be surrounded by such extraordinary people in our friends and family. The undying support, love, prayers, and thoughts that continue to pour in are just simply overwhelming. I now know first hand that love and laughter are truly the most powerful medicine on earth.

So although Thanksgiving is now over, I would still like to give thanks – to all of you – for everything you have given to my mother, as well as our whole family, through this challenging time. We honestly could not have gotten through any of this without you.

I hope you all enjoy the upcoming holiday season, and may your lives be filled with as many blessings as we have been offered this year.

As always, I will keep you posted on Vivi’s progress…

Another Post from Vivi!

Hi All,

I am happy to say you will be getting another guest appearance by, Vivi, the one and only (and might I add, a beautiful post, at that). I am also thrilled to inform you that not only did the surgery go better than we could have hoped, but Vivi is recovering beautifully! We meet with our surgeon on Monday for a follow-up, and then with our oncologist on Wednesday . Once we have those two meetings, hopefully we will have a better idea of what Vivi's chemo schedule and treatment regimen will look like post-surgery. I will let you all know once we have further updates.

In the mean time, I will let you hear from the leading lady herself - VIVI! Happy Holidays to all.

well i guess one might say the surgery went as well as could be expected..better actually..and today the 19th of Nov with a full moon over central park and my dog Butoh by my side i walked over to Wollman rink and almost donned a pair of skates hoping to feel free once more with some wind in my face and some speed on my feet..but it didnt happen..not quite ready for THAT yet..i suppose its me trying to escape the thought of more chemo..the last round i hope..coming up after Thanksgiving..we are by the way actually doing the parade party this year..i was so certain i would be bed bound still..there are many wonderful stories to tell around the surgery and after..but its not for me to do..i'll leave that to Aly..suffice it to say that many wonderful new friendships have ventured into my life through this experience and it has made me realize how lucky i am and how life affirming even the worst of situations can be..these are people along with all of you that i strongly embrace and with whom i will remain fiercely loyal..i love you all and wish everyone a very happy holiday..many happy hugs and kisses all around..vivi

Great News!!!!

Surgery is done. Could not have gone better! Will write more later, but wanted you all to know. Thank you for all the love, prayers, thoughts, and support.

Bye Bye, Baby Makers!

Hi Everyone,

I have to apologize for the tardiness of this post. I, unfortunately, have simply not had time to sit down and write a proper update. However, Vivi will be going in for surgery on Tuesday, so I wanted to touch base with all of you.

The surgery will involve a full hysterectomy, as well as the removal of any other unnecessary organs that the cancer has spread to or that may act as a possible host to returning cancer (not that this cancer is coming back ANY time soon!). While hysterectomies are rather routine surgeries these days, we are all obviously a bit anxious about the outcome of this surgery, and hoping that all will go as well as possible. However, we are lucky to have one of the best surgeons in the country, Dr. Abu-Rustum, so we have no doubt this surgery will go very smoothly.

More importantly, my mother, someone who has now undergone six rounds of very intense chemotherapy, is in remarkably strong shape (not fitness wise...I actually just chuckled at the thought of that) - but her immune system is holding up very well, she has barely lost weight, and she continues to eat like a small horse (something she takes as a compliment or I would not write it). Furthermore, she continues to amaze us all with her strength of will, sense of humor, and general zest for life (and diamonds). She is certainly still Vivi, the one and only, and not at all resembling a "cancer patient".

With that said, Vivi, as well as our family, would still appreciate all the support and help we can get during these next few tough weeks and months. We are not a particularly religious family (although I do believe we are all spiritual in our own ways), and I know there are people of varying religious beliefs on this list. So I please ask that if you pray (in whatever form it may be), that you say an extra prayer, do an extra bow, light another candle, or just wish on one more star for Vivi on Tuesday.

Also, if you would like to send flowers or cards (which is COMPLETELY unnecessary...seriously), Vivi will be at Memorial Sloan Kettering Hospital all next week, and will hopefully be home the week after.

Unfortunately, this is all I have time to write. I have included pictures above from Vivi's birthday party which we had up in Mahopac a few weeks back. What I will say, is that we continue to be overwhelmed by the amount of support, thoughtfulness, and love that seems to keep pouring in from every direction day after day. While this experience has certainly been a challenge for us all, it has also shown us the very best in people, and what an amazing support system we have both within and surrounding our family. So thank you for all you have done for us. Thank you from the bottom of our hearts.

Here is the good news - because I am so busy, I actually managed to talk Vivi into writing part of this post herself! So without further ado (or proofreading...Vivi does not really understand the use of punctuation when she types and I just didn't have the time to fix it. But, honestly, I think it's more genuine this way!), here is the Queen Bee, herself:

DISCLAIMER: THE REST OF THIS POST (ALTHOUGH I HAVE NOT YET READ IT) MAY NOT BE SUITABLE FOR CHILDREN OR THE FAINT OF HEART.

Since Aly is so busy with her events i will now write you all my event so far of late..i've had a wonderful month's break from chemo and have so enjoyed my time in the country and at my barn riding out on the open roads and fields on my pony Valentina enjoying what i think has been the best color spectacle yet..the trees out did themselves! but now its time to face reality once again and face the challenges ahead of me..play time is over for now! Tuesday the 2nd i will have non elective surgery on oh yes..election day..ug! good thing politics is of no interest to me..im a romantic! and good thing i dont want anymore children or God knows maybe even sex!! oops..grandchildren is what i need more of..10 just wont do!! so where was i oh yes..Tuesday..after a lot of pre op testing i will be having a complete hysterectomy and pray that that's it..depending on what my surgeon finds upon opening me up and taking a look at the situation..my cancer has been reduced quite dramatically but we'll see what he sees when he sees it! i should be in hospital about 3 to 5 days depending on how im doing..then home for a long recovery..2 to 3 weeks after surgery i will have to endure the hardest and most intense chemo..kind of the final clean up..and hope to be done with it all by end January..you have all been so wonderful and supportive and following me every step of the way..remarkable! i love you all and i deeply apologize for not being as entertaining as Aly in my writing..she is the one with those skills! she will be back to follow up and continue on with this endless journey when her events are done next week..she has been an absolute inspiration to me as well as everyone in my family..even my dog Butoh insisted that i take a moment to sit on a park bench today and take in the sights of the world around me that i have so missed..and my 2 wonders..June who cares for him in my absence and Ashley who trains my pony and takes me on all those wonderful trails..what would i do without all these great people in my life? well love to you all you are the sunshine i bask in and the stars that shine on me..but no one better than my sweet Moo!!

Phase II Begins

Hello Everyone!

I could not be more thrilled to tell you that Vivi has, once again, dramatically improved since my last post. Not only does she just look fabulous, but she is still getting to enjoy her life for the most part. She has been spending lots of time up at her house, going on trail rides, eating her delicious food, and constantly surrounded by her family and friends. Honestly, sometimes I think she looks better than she has in years!!

From a medical stand point, her CA-125 numbers have plummeted down to 10 (yes, 10!!), which is pretty much a normal count for the CA-125 blood marker. If one of your doctors took your CA-125 and the number was 10, they would not even blink. Since Vivi's numbers dropped so dramatically, her doctors decided they wanted to run a CT scan to see if her numbers were actually reflective of a physical reduction of the cancer. If this was, in fact, the case then Vivi would most likely be ready for surgery and not have to continue on with her current chemo treatments.

The good news is that Vivi is, in fact, physically ready for surgery. The report from the scan showed extremely positive results, with a "marked reduction in the amount and size of tumors." Obviously, we are all thrilled!! However, although Vivi's body is ready for surgery, her surgeon's schedule is not. Unfortunately (although it makes no difference from a medical perspective), our in-high-demand surgeon was not even able to meet with Vivi until September 15th (tomorrow), at which point he will hopefully set a date for surgery - most likely in early October. After her surgery, Vivi will have two to three weeks to recover (with about 1 week in the hospital), after which she will begin the next phase of her treatment. In the meantime, Vivi is continuing on with her current treatment plan and just had her fifth round of chemo last Friday. This means she is currently doing her best to grit through her tough week post-treatment.

The week before this last treatment, we met with Vivi's oncologist, who loosely explained what Vivi's new chemo regimen will involve. We were all aware that during Vivi's surgery she would have a port inserted into her abdomen, through which she would receive chemo directly into the affected area. However, we did not realize that she would actually be undergoing an entirely new chemotherapy regimen and schedule. So while I am not 100% clear on all the new medication Vivi will now be receiving (Dr. Makker did not go into detail about that), I was able to grasp the new schedule.

Vivi will still be on a 21-day cycle. However, she will now receive chemo on days 1, 2, and 8 - with the chemo on days 2 and 8 being administered through the port. On day 3 she will receive a hydration treatment, as the new medicine is known to leave a strong metallic taste in the patient's mouth, making it very difficult for many people to tolerate water. Therefore, the doctors give IV hydration to ensure that patients do not get dehydrated (something that is very important for Vivi's heart, if you remember). We were also told, that some patients actually end up having to come in every day for hydration treatments depending on how they are tolerating the medicine.

Aside from the metallic after-taste, there are two other factors that may make this next phase of treatment quite a bit more difficult. First, we were warned that the new medication Vivi will be receiving is much harsher on the patient's system than the medications she was receiving before. In addition to the risk of dehydration, patients undergoing this treatment tend to be prone to more nausea and vomiting (this is due to both the medication itself and the fact that it is going directly into the lining of her stomach), as well as lower white blood cell counts (weaker immune systems). The second concern is that currently Vivi receives her chemotherapy as an inpatient in the hospital so her doctors can monitor her heart. While her stays in the hospital seem to get shorter with each treatment, if she has to continue receiving her chemotherapy as an inpatient, that will likely mean a lot of time in and out of the hospital for quite a few months.

Luckily, if all goes well, we are likely only looking at 3-4 rounds of this new treatment, which is rather short in duration - just about 3 months. I told my mother that one can do ANYTHING for three months. Except, in her case, not eat chocolate. Or buy a new head scarf. Or cook. Seriously though, this means that come winter time, Vivi could be sitting on a beach in the Caribbean and IN REMISSION! While the former may be less likely, I believe with all my heart that the latter is just inevitable! Especially considering the progress she has made so far, the amazing support system we have, and Vivi's continued will to beat this disease and get those 10 carats (inside joke...love you mom).

So while we still have a tough road ahead, the end is hopefully in sight, and I do strongly believe we are heading into the home stretch!!

In other news, last week was a very sad week for Vivi, our family, and our dear friend June (who has become the full-time caretaker for our dogs while Vivi is ill), as we had to say goodbye to our beloved dog and family member, Sammy. Sammy was a ripe 15-years-old (which is about 140 in dog years), and lived a beautiful life full of family, love, cuddles, and lots of food from the table. However, it just came to the point where his quality of life was not what it should be, and he was beginning to suffer - something all dog owners want to avoid at all costs. So the decision was made that it was his time - and it truly was. While we can find comfort in knowing he went in peace (with my father at his side), our hearts were still broken to have to say goodbye. He was a very special dog, and will forever be a part of our family. So if you get a chance to shoot a line to my mother and June (even in the comments below), I know it would be much appreciated. I know it was a very tough loss for my mother to bear in the midst of everything else going on, but as usual, she handled it together with June, with strength, grace, a sense of humor, and many, many phone calls.

On a happier note, it's Vivi's birthday on Saturday! Talk about a ripe age - she will be turning 69-years-young! We will be celebrating with a big family dinner at a local restaurant in Mahopac. My sister is even flying over for the occasion! So please make sure you wish her a Happy Birthday if you get a chance. If you don't - don't worry - she has MANY, MANY more to go!! Although I am supposed to tell you to send all gifts and checks to her address in the city.

I hope you are all enjoying the change in weather (and a New Year for many). May the new season/year bring health and happiness to all of you.